Frustration often brings me to my knees. I was in a such a state earlier this week, praying for guidance and wondering where to go next. I’ve had a flood of questions on my mind lately and it’s gotten to the point where I just need to trust God that He’s got things covered. Still, some days, I question whether or not my dreams are lined up with His.

I was having one of “those days” on Monday. You know, when things just don’t seem to be going right. A lot of my stress lately is related to trying to operate a business by myself. It’s a huge responsibility and quite the load to carry, especially since I’m so young and just learning.

I was browsing through countless Facebook updates on Monday when my eye caught the latest message from the Dave Ramsey page. It was an update requesting folks to email Dave with their questions for a special “Be Your Own Boss” episode. Hmmm. What the heck? It was worth a shot. I typed a quick email up and sent it out. On Tuesday, when I saw an email with “Dave Ramsey” in the subject line, I didn’t think much of it. I’m always getting auto replies in response to my questions. But I clicked it just the same, and to my utter delight, this email was in fact from the assistant show producer asking me if I’d like to talk to Dave on air during the recording on the “Be Your Own Boss” episode. (**insert ginormous smilie icon here**)

By now, I’m realizing that God does big things…bigger than I ask for. He makes me wait sometimes, but I can appreciate that His answer was fast and so obvious this time. Why do I doubt? He’s always got my back.

If YOU would like to check out the Dave Ramsey show, click the image below for a complete listing of shows available on Hulu:

You know the saying, “all good things must come to an end”?  

I don’t believe that saying. If God is the Maker of all good things, and God never ends, then the good things can’t end either. He doesn’t just stop blessing people all of the sudden – it doesn’t work that way (unless you walk away and want nothing to do with it).

This year has brought me many new and amazing things, and it’s only April! I know that by now you’re probably tiring of the word “amazing”  because I realize that I’ve been immensely overusing the word. What else can I say? Things are just…GOOD! Spectacular! Amazing!

Okay, I admit that the down days do in fact come. Let me share an example with you. A couple weeks ago, I was preparing for my first night of a 7 week business course in the city. I was going to get there early, find the building immediately, and walk in cool and confident. 

I got to the campus, playing a happy song over my car speakers from my iPhone playlist. I felt confident and stylish in my fabulous sunglasses. Then disaster struck; I got lost! 

I drove in circles, baffled and completely out of sorts. I didn’t panic right away, knowing that all I had to do was pull out my beloved iPhone and give the office a call to find the location of the classroom. Easy, right? Nahhhhh! I had lost all my phone contacts the week prior, and forgotten to add the office number back in. I quickly tried to check my mail and retrieve the phone number in an email that was in the trash. The phone started acting up, pausing and freezing, finally requiring a reset (this was an iPhone – not supposed to happen!!). After 3 failed attempts to open the contents of my trash folder, I gave up, called my mom and had her pull up the information on my laptop at home. I sighed, calming myself, and dialed the number as soon as I got it. It was okay; things would be just fine.

Ring. Ring. Ring. No one answered the phone.

GAH! Not cool! I sat the phone down and reached for my bluetooth, planning to turn it on so I could drive around and keep looking. Thunk. WHAT WAS THAT? I looked down to where I had just set my phone. It was gone. I drove my hand down in the tiny space beneath my seat in panic. I needed my phone to call and find the class, and it was already ten past six – I was late! My hand got stuck and with a grimace I yanked it back out.

I jumped out of the car and tried to open the back door of my ’98 Explorer, thinking I could reach it from there.

The door wouldn’t open. 

I yanked and yanked, but that back door was stuck! WHY?! WHY ME?! WHY NOW?! It was 15 past now, and I was getting more anxious by the minute. Finally, I went around to the other side and opened it, and there sat my phone. I grabbed it and jumped back in the drivers seat.

Suddenly I noticed a number on my directions. Could that help me?? It was the building number, and minutes later I found the location. (Duh!) I parked, practically RAN inside the doors, and found myself lost again. Fortunately, I wasn’t the only person lost and didn’t feel so stupid walking in another 10 minutes later at 6:30 (a half hour late)! It was an unnerving experience and had me ready to just give up on the whole idea.

It’s things like that that hit me when I least see it coming. Things glitch, people make mistakes, or things come up missing. It might not sound like a big deal, but if I’m already stretched in too many directions, it’s likely that some part of me is going to snap like a rubber band being pulled too far apart and breaking as a result. My life is great but don’t get me wrong, I do have my bad days!

Bad days aside, if you’ve read this far, congrats. I commend you for your perseverance as I know I can be long winded at times!! (Years of struggling with not  knowing what to say have turned around into have too much to say!)

I do have a bit of exciting news I’d like to share before I close. I have been asked to do a one hour presentation at this year’s LEAH Convention in Rochester, NY, an event that attracts an estimated 4,000 homeschoolers each year. Of course, I won’t be speaking to quite that many in my workshop, but I do look forward to the event immensely! What a FABULOUS opportunity.  If anyone had told me 5 years ago I’d be speaking at the LEAH Convention, I would’ve laughed in their face and likely told that person to go jump in a lake somewhere (haha). So let me just leave you with this thought before I sign off for the night and get some greatly needed rest:

Good things don’t come to an end with God. He’s got your future all laid out – much like a blueprint –  and you will never be disappointed. He’s got your back!

I have always been an ambitious kind of gal. But I never expected this. I didn’t think that I’d find myself every day waking up to surprises from God so huge that I would literally shake in my seat, overwhelmed with excitement. I didn’t think I’d be anyone all that special; I’ve always been just an ordinary little redhead with a big attitude. However, what I’ve been encountering lately is by no means what one would consider ordinary.

As I sat here tonight in front of my MacBook, filled with awe over everything that has transpired over the past few weeks, I wondered what I did to deserve it all. I’m not any better than my friends or family. What was it that God saw in me worth rewarding? I am a simple girl with big dreams. I am no more than a 20 year old homeschool graduate that still lives with her parents with not a day of college to her name. I work in an itty bitty retail store part time, sorting through boxes of freight and putting clothes on hangers. It almost sounds as if I’m hiding away from the world, doesn’t it? 

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’”  -Matthew 25:23, NIV

Really, God, really?? I’ve always been well-behaved, mannerly, and I’ve always enjoyed being around people. I’ve sought out God in a deeper way over the past few years and I’ve passed the test in the struggles. Really, God? Am I worthy of such great blessings?

If this is what it’s like to live under the reign of the Most High King, then I want no other life. Sharing in my Master’s happiness as the verse in Matthew says, is the most wonderful state of mind I’ve ever experienced.

My blog title really isn’t an expression of what I’m feeling right now. It’s probably leaning more towards the air of sarcasm, but we’ll pretend that’s not the case. These last couple of days, I’ve been sending out hundreds of emails to homeschool groups around the US, informing them of the existence of Bit & Bridle Magazine. It’s a lot of tedious work, but I pray it pays off. I’ve already been seeing some interest so I believe the results will be good. The thought to start my email chain was birthed by the memory of how I first learned of B&B. It was through an email, sent to my mom a few years ago by a homeschool group in my area. Who would’ve thought I’d be editor a few short years later. Huh. God works in mysterious ways! I won’t complain about that one. So that’s what I’ve been busying myself with these week.

Btw, I added 550 words to the book tonight, even amidst all the emails I was sending. It feels good to accomplish many tasks at once!